Today's Chuckle - Harlan Collins

Harlan Collins

Harlan Collins follows in the footsteps of his illustrious journalist father, Tom Collins, who, in 1948, created Today's Chuckle, featured daily in newspapers nationwide. Harlan continues the tradition, contributing daily to this fifty-year-old feature. Collins has written a book, published by Putnam, entitled Today's Chuckle: 2500 Great One Liners for Every Occasion, honoring this historic half-century milestone. Today's Chuckle is syndicated nationwide by the Tribune Syndicate and holds the distinction of being the most widely syndicated front-page feature in the world.

Collins is currently EVP of Strategy & Marketing at Global Media Transfer, a software/hardware solution for the entertainment industry, transferring and monitoring metadata projects on a global basis.

Prior to joining GMT, Collins served as a VP at VITAC Corporation, Creative Director of Voxworks Technologies, Creative Director and COO of The Movie Treasury and Creative Director of Gelula/SDI.

Harlan Collins' songs have earned him accolades and gold records for his musical contributions to artists such as Barbara Streisand and Olivia-Newton John, and he became one of the few artists signed to Beatles manager Brian Epstein's cutting edge label, Nemperor Records. Harlan has also composed and arranged music for the award-winning TV show Sesame Street and the cult classic film This Is Spinal Tap, and has performed as a featured musical guest on Saturday Night Live. Collins is, additionally, the author/composer of over a dozen musicals, including Highlander - A Celtic Opera (_www.highlanderopera.com_) and Underwing (_www.underwing.tv_).

Collins attended New York University, majoring in film and drama. He currently lives in Los Angeles.

Harlan Collins Samples

Sunday, April 19, 2015

If Moses came today, he'd need to text the 10 Commandments to everyone's smartphones to actually get them read. Monday, April 20, 2015. While the rest of us are reading self-help books, the one-percenters are reading help-yourself books.

Sunday, April 12, 2015

If there is such a thing as eternal punishment, surely it must involve opera music and head cheese. Monday, April 13, 2015. It's now impossible to know whether you can judge a book by its cover since nobody reads them anymore.

Sunday, April 5, 2015

Love is blind, but only up until the wedding. Monday, April 6, 2015. If you want something done right, do it yourself ... then call an actual professional to fix what you messed up. Tuesday, April 7, 2015.

Sunday, March 29, 2015

The last shall be first and the first shall be last ... particularly if people keep cutting in line. Monday, March 30, 2015.

Sunday, March 22, 2015

Greater love hath no man than when he's looking in the mirror. Monday, March 23, 2015. Variety may be the spice of life, but monotony buys the groceries. Tuesday, March 24, 2015.

Sunday, March 15, 2015

When it's finally time to meet your Maker, just hope your warranty hasn't run out. Monday, March 16, 2015. To err is human ... as long as you don't admit it to anybody. Tuesday, March 17, 2015.

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